50 Shades of Grey, Christians, and Female Sexuality

I'm pretty passionate about women needing to embrace their own sexuality without shame and without regard to male sexual desire, and today I'm over at The Friendly Atheist to review Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery's book Pulling Back the Shades, their Christian response to 50 Shades of Grey. This [is] a pervasive problem in Christian relationship books … Continue reading 50 Shades of Grey, Christians, and Female Sexuality

IR: Agency

One of the things that has been a constant struggle for me, as a woman leaving the world of Christian patriarchy, has been reconciling reality to my learned "right" responses. I have to be gutsy and take charge of my life and heed my personality type and my needs and make sure I'm living in … Continue reading IR: Agency

A Confession (a guest post)

Christian fundamentalism and Christian patriarchy hurt men too. I'm sobered and thankful for this guest post by my friend Tim. -h *** I have been avoiding this all day. All week. In one way or another, I've been avoiding this all my life. Some of you may think you know me, but you don't, not … Continue reading A Confession (a guest post)

Why it matters: picking the lock of Christian patriarchy

Yesterday the Feminisms Fest was all about why we're feminists. Today's question is: why does it matter? I read Emily Joy Allison's post this morning about how feminism matters to her because of her younger sisters, and chuckled, because she basically wrote my post for me. But there's a difference in our stories, and I'm … Continue reading Why it matters: picking the lock of Christian patriarchy

Why I’m a feminist: books & opinions of my own

I was talking with some friends this week about favorite childhood books (we're still not over Sheftu. True story.) and I realized that reading good stories with strong female characters built a lot of subconscious mental structure which helped me see women as equal to men, and drove me to be skeptical of the soft … Continue reading Why I’m a feminist: books & opinions of my own

Strong women

I was sitting with her, pouring out some woeful stories close to my heart. And when I finished, she chuckled and said this: "Weak men are intimidated by strong women. They don't know what to do with them. They're afraid of them." And I've been mulling that over for two weeks. I call myself a … Continue reading Strong women

IR: Analyzing “God told me you were the one”

Disclaimer: This is a semi-fictionalized story blended from a couple different real events in my life. All the guys who inspired this are good and well-intended men who grew up a lot afterwards. The point of this is not the guys themselves, but the ideas they assumed to be true because of the Christian culture … Continue reading IR: Analyzing “God told me you were the one”

Immodesty Rail: Anger and Women

I've been stewing on this one for a long time. It's controversial. It's probably something we don't want to admit that we do. But I think it needs to be named and noticed. Within the church and western culture, our assumptions about gender roles create some tensions between the personality of an individual and the ideal … Continue reading Immodesty Rail: Anger and Women

Commonplace Links 11/9

I feel like I should have posted more this week. I know I wanted to write another Immodesty Rail post, and I wanted to tell you about the author readings and book signings I've been to this last month (Lorin Stein, Mary Oliver, Billy Collins). But it's been an exhausting week, and some people took … Continue reading Commonplace Links 11/9

Immodesty Rail: Purity Guilt

Shortly after her breakup with her serious boyfriend of two years, a friend confided in me that she worried that no good Christian guys would be interested in her, because of the things she had done with her ex. "What sorts of things?" I wondered. Her response: nothing more than your average youthful makeout sessions, … Continue reading Immodesty Rail: Purity Guilt